If celebrating the holidays after loss is something you either struggle with or look forward to, here are a few ideas on how you can turn this into a season of moments dedicated to the beauty you’ve found because of the people you so miss. This season especially can be a devotion to the lives who’ve gone before your own. It can be a window into the love and bond you still share. A time to celebrate being alive is also a time to celebrate their lifetime.
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You’ve loved, and you’ve lost. You have carried what couldn’t be fixed. You’re still learning the meaning of forgiveness. You're in good company here. Which leads me to share this poem with you, called "The Unbroken." That's how I like to think of you and I.
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Life after the most difficult things isn't easy, but I’d rather live one lifetime like that — heartbreak, love, heartbreak, love — than a thousand lifetimes with my heart closed, feeling nothing at all. Read this letter if you need inspiration for how you live your "life after."
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True, wholesome, meaningful forgiveness doesn’t stop at saying a few magic words. But it could start there. Like every facet of healing, forgiveness is a process. If certain experiences in your past still weigh heavy on your soul, and you’re ready to confront them, then explore your own "things I forgive you for" list.
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This poem is another take on the concept of healing "from" trauma. Whether it's loss or illness or some other excruciating pain you've endured, the truth is that some kinds of pain don't ever go away. You can't go back to the life you had before. You can't go back to "normal" - but you *can* lay claim to your new life.
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When you make decisions from a place of love, awareness, and integrity, they're decisions you can be proud of. Use these questions and prompts to help you identify the practices that’ll keep you true to who you are and how you want to show up in life. Use a journal and give yourself the time and space to reflect on your values.
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This is a message for the person who’s been dealing with chronic pain as just another part of their life. This is to say: of course you’re still an incredible human being. If you have someone in your life who inspires you by how they live and love through their pain, pass this letter on to them. It’s an “I see you” kind of thing.
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A large part of healing involves setting boundaries. Boundaries, in my own language, are the intersection at which I can take care of myself and be fully present with you. They’re guidelines for how I want to be treated and how I choose to respond. It’s when I don’t set those guidelines for myself that I lose myself in other people. Your personal boundaries communicate to others -- and to your own self -- what works for you and what doesn’t.
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If you've ever thought things like "Why me?" or "What if... ?" here's another, more helpful question for you: now that you’re here, after all you've been through, what will you do? Instead of trying to change the past or escape the facts, this one simple question puts you in the present moment: where new life can grow.
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