Grief is a process. It definitely isn't linear; more like the tides or the seasons. The more familiar I get with it, the more I see that pretty much everything in life has its seasons... including you.
Each season of grief brings its own lessons and challenges, its own weather and mood. And each one has its place.
Each season of YOU is worth coming through. However terrible it feels.
That's just one thing I've learned from loss, so far.
Here's another thing: if you open your heart to everything you feel (very hard to do), you'll see that even death can teach you how to live.
25 Important Things I've Learned from Loss
- There is no "normal."
- There is no "perfect."
- No matter what happened then, you have a say in what happens now.
- One step at a time is the best way through.
- Not everything has (or needs) a silver lining.
- You can't rush your healing.
- You can't force forgiveness.
- You don't need to hide your darkness.
- You don't need to grieve the same way every time.
- It's okay for joy to grow from the roots of sorrow.
- You can feel broken AND grateful, hopeful AND scared, depression AND resilience.
- There's light in the dark, and dark in the light.
- Relationships don't have to end when one person dies.
- Letting go of their physical belongings doesn't mean they're in your life any less.
- You're connected to everyone you've ever loved.
- You honor who you lost by how you live now.
- Your story is important enough to share.
- Everyone has a story worth listening to.
- Helping others helps you.
- Helping yourself helps others.
- Loving each other and loving yourself is kind of the same thing.
- You have to let yourself receive, too.
- Healing is important but so is "just living."
- You need sleep, movement, and fresh air in your lungs.
- You're going to have to learn some of the same things over and over again.
... probably a million other things.
I hope this makes you feel better about where you are in your process.
Let yourself be a process, too.
. . .
Which of these things are you learning right now? Anything else you'd add here from your own list?
Tell me in the comments. I read every single one, and I'd love to know.
P.S. To feel a little less alone, and a little more whole, get my Healing Heart Space meditation.
P.P.S. Want these kinds of posts in your inbox? Sign up for Tuesday emails and you'll also get my Healing Brave Manifesto, totally free.