Instead of resorting to the same old “How was your day?” try asking questions that inspire more meaningful and enjoyable end-of-day conversations with your loved ones.
“How was your day?” can symbolize your willingness to be present with someone else’s thoughts and feelings, and that in itself is a gesture of generosity.
But if the question is routine and lacks sincerity, it can come across as lazy and feel stagnant for both you and the person you’re asking.
Something to keep in mind is that your presence is just as powerful as the question itself, maybe even more important.
The people you love deserve your undivided attention and sincere support. That’s how you keep relationships strong, by being 100% there during the ordinary, everyday moments.
So, instead of asking “How was your day?” try something new.
Choose one or a few of the questions below to help you get started.
The goal isn’t to fix their problems but to invite them to think through their day and extract something valuable from it, even if it was a frustrating day. The goal is to hold a supportive space for the highs and lows, to reinforce successful strategies, to celebrate their joys, and to offer empathy where needed.
Here are some ideas to help you celebrate and support the people you share your home and life with.
If you ask the right questions, you might be surprised by how much you learn.
20 Questions to Ask Besides “How Was Your Day?” for Richer Conversations
1. What was the best part of your day?
2. Is there a frustrating moment or struggle that you’d like to get off your chest?
3. Now that you’re home, is there anything I can do to help you?
4. How are you really feeling today?
5. Tell me three good things about today.
“Giving someone your undivided attention is one of the most generous things you can do.” — Ali B. Moe
6. Did you receive any good news today?
7. What’s something you’re grateful for having seen, heard, or been a part of?
8. Did you see anything beautiful where you didn’t expect to?
9. What songs did you listen to today?
10. Did you listen to an audiobook or a podcast? What was it about?
11. Did you read anything interesting today?
12. Did you learn anything new?
13. What’s the best conversation you had today?
14. What are you most proud of today?
15. Did you get the chance to help anyone today?
“When you talk, you are only repeating what you already know. But when you listen, you may learn something new.” — Dalai Lama
16. Did anyone help you with something today?
17. Did you get any compliments today?
18. Did you make any good connections with your coworkers/customers/clients/coach/boss today?
19. Are there any victories you’d like to share?
20. What did you spend most of your time doing/thinking about today?
. . .
Which of these questions will you be asking tonight?
Tell me in the comments. And tell me how it goes, if you want. I read every single one, and I’d love to know!
P.S. For 99 more ways to end your day on a positive note, get my book Sleep Rituals: 100 Practices for a Deep and Peaceful Sleep. You’ll get better at letting the stress go so you can just… relax.