Thoughtful Words of Affirmation to Speak to Your Loved Ones
If your love language is giving and receiving words of affirmation, this is for you. Sew compassion into your words and you’ll sow happiness in your relationships.
In a nutshell, we give and receive love in different ways. The way you express love and appreciation might not resonate with the other person. Their effort to communicate love might not have its intended effect on you.
Here’s an example: You constantly shower your loved one with gifts, but there’s a disconnect somewhere. Receiving gifts isn’t their love language, but it’s yours. They’d rather hear some positive words of affirmation (a compliment, a thank you) instead. Knowing this, you can speak their language more clearly. And you’ll both feel the love.
“And in the end, we were all just humans, drunk on the idea that love, only love, could heal our brokenness.” — Christopher Poindexter
If your loved one lights up when you give them words of affirmation, here are some ideas to help you send love their way.
Psst: Be sincere and specific. If you say “I love you,” follow that up with “because…”
Sample Words of Affirmation to Help You Communicate Love More Effectively
Words of appreciation
“Thank you for being a positive role model by…”
“Thank you for making my mornings easier and my days more worthwhile. I love knowing that I have you in my corner.”
“You are my best friend. You encourage me when I’m doubtful and inspire me to be my best self.”
“I really appreciated it when you helped me out with…”
“I am blessed to work/live/be with you, because…”
“You make my life easier every time you…”
How sweet a simple “thank you” can be, and how quickly it can sow joy.
Words of admiration
“Your work ethic inspires me to do my best work.”
“I really admire your cheerful attitude. It’s so nice to be around your positive energy and smiling face.”
“You care so much about the quality of what you do. I love how you pay such close attention to…”
“You are courageous because you are genuinely yourself, which isn’t always easy. I admire your authenticity and the ways you stay true to yourself by…”
“It impressed me when you…”
Words of empathy
“I know how tough things have been lately, and I want you to know that the way you’re handling ________ is so inspiring to me.”
“I don’t know everything about what you’re going through, but I’d like to understand a little better if you’re willing to have me listen.”
“It must be really challenging when you have to…”
“I just want you to know that I honor what you’re going through right now. I am here for you.”
“I know you feel broken right now, but I think you are brave and strong because…”
Empathy isn't a burden. The price may be high, but the reward is great: deep connection.
Words of encouragement
“I am so proud of all that you’ve accomplished, such as… and I’m excited for what you’ve yet to accomplish.”
“You are making a difference, in the lives of others and in my life. You help me…”
“I can see you coming out of this struggle with renewed light and passion. You’re a shining example to everyone who knows you. You’re a beacon of hope for everyone who is going through this or will go through this.”
“I believe in you (and what’s possible for you) because…”
“I know you’re capable of great things because…”
“I believe in you.” Words that water flowers. — Michael Faudet
Words of acknowledgement
“You look radiant and full of life today.”
“I really love how I feel when I’m around you. Your energy is magnetic and feels…”
“It makes me so happy to see you following your dreams. You’re a source of encouragement to me every time you…”
“I couldn’t help but notice how you…”
“You were so creative when you…”
“I respect you for…”
“People start to heal the moment they feel heard.” —Cheryl Richardson
Tell me:
Are words of affirmation your love language, or something else? (Gifts, acts of service, quality time, touch?)
Tell me in the comments. I read every single one, and I’d love to know!
With love,
Jen
P.S. Want more words of affirmation… like, hundreds more? Get either of my books! Get Sleep Affirmations with 200 phrases for peace of mind and healing while you sleep. Get Morning Affirmations with 200 phrases for an intentional and openhearted start to your day. They’ll love it. You will too.
Comments on this post (12)
Hi Niki, thank you for the suggestion. I will need to write some affirmations on this topic this year. All the warmth of my heart be yours. x
— Jennifer Williamson
I need the words for when you’re rebuilding trust and showing consistency with a partner. Most words of affirmation are assuming the relationship is good and healthy, I need to repair. We’re also separated. Many phrases don’t ring true making this even harder. I also want to express love and not desperation. Quite the tall order.
— Niki
Hyland, you can even think or speak or write these words (or other blessings/prayers) with your friend in mind, without them being with you to hear or know. Wishing you the hope and light you need right now. x
— Jennifer Williamson
Affirmations for someone else without them knowing? I am trying to affirm that my friend Nadia Martinez goes and completes the Cenikor long term substance abuse treatment
— Hyland Mullins
Summer, that’s a very good question! I can’t say I am an expert in this field, but the one thing I know to be true from my own experiences is that open, honest communication is the glue that holds a relationship together. That’s how my other and I have operated for the last 4 years, and even in the recent months we’ve been more honest and open than ever. It can be really hard to speak truthfully and be vulnerable because there’s a risk of the other person getting angry, and us getting defensive in return. BUT I’ve found if you open up that conversation of what you like and don’t like, and do it in as loving a way as possible, your relationship grows to a new level, and grows stronger. I’d even say, head to the love languages website and read up more – there’s a lot of good advice there! Wishing you both all the love you deserve <3
— Jennifer Williamson
I know my love languages are primarily receiving gifts, physical touch, and acts of service. I have not asked my significant other to take the love language questionnaire, because that’s not really the nature of our relationship and we are not struggling to show each other love at the moment. However, I notice that his ways of communicating love are words of affirmation above all else (though he also expresses through the other four). The one he expresses love through least, however, is giving gifts. He has given me a couple of gifts before, surprised me and paid for most of a trip, treated me to many dinners, shown up with a type of food I had barely noted on being my favorite, and he’s written me a note. These things are the ones that touch me so deeply. He showers me in words of affirmations often, but I can’t help but feel slightly awkward and superficial when I hear them. He has moved away from giving gifts and acts of service in the past month and even neglected to get me a birthday present (even though he had mentioned wanting to get me something as awesome as I am). I am able to move past that, but it definitely makes it harder to believe the loving words he showers me in. How could I communicate to him this need of mine while still respecting the appreciation I have for him as a whole, and without making him feel like he has to spend a lot of money on me?
— Summer Marie
Doné, it’s so hard to form that connective tissue between your LL and his. It’s really helpful that you know each other’s LL though! That’s the best place to start. :) I wish I had some good relationship advice, but my boyfriend and I are learning about our own LLs and realizing that we each like to receive and give in different ways. He’s much more into acts of service (like your other!) and I like words of affirmation (like you!), so it’s a challenge (but also an experiment, which is a more fun way to think about it). For acts of service, I’ve found ways to help him that he would rather not do, like handle the finances, or take care of shopping and paying for all the little things while he pays rent (because little things stress him out). Or planning a day trip, being the one to suggest we spend time with his friends/family. It doesn’t always have to be big, just little thoughtful steps. One step at a time :)
— Jennifer Williamson
Marie, I’m so so glad you found meaning and inspiration in these words!
— Jennifer Williamson
Hi
My main LL is words of affirmation, 2nd Physical touch,quality time, acta of serbice, receiving gifts.
My fiancee acts of service as main LL, quality time 2nd, physical touch 3rd, words of affirm and receiving gifts last.
He struggles with my LL , or rather it all happened alot in the beginning as always but started getting less and less. He doesnt like getting gifts but i like spoiling everyone sometimes. His main LL is acts of service but if i want to dl something for him for eg cook dinner as he does most of the cooking as he enjoys it, he declines it..
He doesnt want me to do anything for him or very little, but he does stuff for me but in the way he shows love.
But i also would like to have love shown in my LL as i try to do it in his LL but he doesnt always allow me to.
He was married for 11yrs and not used to showing or reiving love like this. Ive tried giving tips but it gets done for few days and then it stops.
Feeling bit “lonely” and unappreciated.
— Doné Nel
I was in desperation in the last few days and trying to solve out myself. I make it true I can do it. From Google, I found two AWESOME blogs that help me to come out from the darkness. One of Jennifer Williamson’s blog and the other one is ( https://www.yessupply.co/20-affirmations-to-manifest-your-yes/ ) Reese Evans. Really, I want to say thanks to both of them.
— Marie Cagle
I’m so glad this can help, Judith <3 Jen
— Jennifer Williamson
This is very inspiring and helpful.Sometimes it becomes difficult to be expressive to your partner to show love and appreciation… Thanks it will help me to me a difference in my love life with my husband.
— Judith