It hurts because it mattered, and it will always matter. I've learned that grief is another name for Love and that no matter how deep your grief makes a home in you, love will always leave a window open. A window for fresh air in the middle of the storm, for a hope that comes after you've lost all hope.
There’s an invisible thread connecting your heart to all hearts, you to all life. Grief is a heavy weight to carry and it's also an anchor in love. It's not something you can rush or push past. It feels so like fear that it's hard to see how it can leave room for love.
But love finds its way through you. You learn to breathe it in and out, the love and the fear, all at the same time. You'll find pain in letting go and hope in what you pick up. This, because you're here to experience it all.
If you want to honor the love that your pain stems from and goes back to, but you're not sure how, read these grief quotes.
21 Grief Quotes That Highlight the Love You’ll Never Lose
1. “So often we try to make other people feel better by minimizing their pain, by telling them that it will get better (which it will) or that there are worse things in the world (which there are). But that’s not what I actually needed. What I needed was for someone to tell me that it hurt because it mattered.” – John Green
2. “When we lose someone we love we must learn not to live without them, but to live with the love they left behind.” –Unknown
3. “Grief is not linear. It’s not a slow progression forward toward healing, it’s a zigzag, a terrible back-and-forth from devastated to okay until finally there are more okay patches and fewer devastated ones. The mind can’t handle emotions like grief and terror for any sustained period of time, so it takes some downtime.” – Lisa Unger, Beautiful Lies: A Novel
4. “You see, love and grief are two sides of the same precious coin. One does not—and cannot—exist without the other. They are the yin and yang of our lives… Grief is predicated on our capacity to give and receive love. Some people choose not to love and so never grieve. If we allow ourselves the grace that comes with love, however, we must allow ourselves the grace that is required to mourn.” – Alan D. Wolfelt, Ph. D.
5. “Grief only exists where love lived first.” – Franchesca Cox
6. “We need to grieve the ones we've lost — not to sustain our connection to suffering, but to sustain our connection to love.” – Jennifer Williamson
7. “Every time we make the decision to love someone, we open ourselves to great suffering, because those we most love cause us not only great joy but also great pain. The greatest pain comes from leaving…the pain of the leaving can tear us apart. Still, if we want to avoid the suffering of leaving, we will never experience the joy of loving. And love is stronger than fear, life stronger than death, hope stronger than despair. We have to trust that the risk of loving is always worth taking.” — Henri Nouwen
8. “But in all of the sadness, when you’re feeling that your heart is empty, and lacking, you’ve got to remember that grief isn’t the absence of love. Grief is the proof that love is still there.” – Tessa Shaffter, Heaven Has No Regrets
9. “To live in hearts we leave behind is not to die.” – Thomas Campbell
10. “Grief is a matter of the heart and soul. Grieve your loss, allow it in, and spend time with it. Suffering is the optional part. Love never dies, and spirit knows no loss. Keep in mind that a broken heart is an open heart.” – Louise Hay & David Kessler, You Can Heal Your Heart
11. “Never. We never lose our loved ones. They accompany us; they don’t disappear from our lives. We are merely in different rooms.” – Paulo Coelho, Aleph
12. “Grief opens a place in our hearts that we never knew could hurt so profoundly, but it also opens this same place to a love we never imagined possible” – Unknown
13. “Grief is the price we pay for love.” – Queen Elizabeth II
14. “Grief is not a disorder, a disease, or a sign of weakness. It is an emotional, physical and spiritual necessity; the price you pay for love. The only cure for grief is to grieve.” – Dr. Earl A. Grollman
15. “Grief is so human, and it hits everyone at one point or another, at least, in their lives. If you love, you will grieve, and that’s just given.” – Kay Redfield Jamison
16. “To mourn your loss is required if you are to befriend the love you have been granted. To honor your grief is not self-destructive or harmful, it is life-sustaining and life-giving, and it ultimately leads you back to love again. In this way, love is both the cause and the antidote.” – Alan D. Wolfelt, Ph. D.
17. “The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain.” – Kahlil Gibran
18. “When you are sorrowful look again into your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight.” – Kahlil Gibran
19. “Love, where it ever existed before, doesn't cease to exist. To speak of love in the past tense is not to know love at all. Love goes on, being always a continuation and an extension of love. Your grief is but the continuation of the love you once experienced, and will always experience. Grief is another name for Love.” – Jennifer Williamson
20. “There is a sacredness in tears. They are not the mark of weakness, but of power. They speak more eloquently than ten thousand tongues. They are the messengers of overwhelming grief, a deep contrition, and of unspeakable love.” – Washington Irving
21. “Grief is no more necessary when we understand death than fear is necessary when we understand flying.” – Richard Bach
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Which of these quotes is your favorite?
Tell me in the comments. I read every single one, and I'd love to know!
P.S. Not sure how you're going to find your way back home... to the love? Keep this poem somewhere you'll see it every day, so you never forget how resilient you can be. How much hope there still is.